Persuasive Email Pitches – How To Get People Curious For More!
Like to be a fly on the wall as I critique 30+ vendor email pitches I received recently!?
I can tell you they varied dramatically in terms of their approach.
This all started when my inbox was recently flooded with CyberSec vendor pitches (after attending a Conf).
Whilst I wasn’t interested in their products and services, I was interested in the way they *pitched* them.
Here are the Top 3 mistakes I saw them make and what I’d recommend you do instead.
If you pitch to clients / simply seek endorsement from stakeholders via email – this one’s for you!
TOP 3 MISTAKES MADE
🚫 #1 – SOLUTION FOCUSSED
Roughly 20% of vendors jumped straight into talking about their product or service. 😱
With no reference to who the product/service was for or what problem it solved…
This means you as the recipient are left with literally no clue about who would need that service or what that service offers. Plus, no curiosity about the value it provides.
Also, if you focus on the solution, people will feel like they’re being ‘sold’ something and may get put off.
So it’s a terrible option!
🚫 #2 – A LONG DENSE EMAIL
About 50% of vendors shared a massive amount of information. Which means you’re drowning in a sea of text as a recipient. 😧
As most of us are busy, that means we probably won’t read it – at all.
So, not a great idea either.
🚫 #3 – ONLY SHARING INFO
95% of vendors made the mistake of just sharing information. So it’s a very common one.
But lots of discrete information is taxing to read and make sense of. 🤯 It’s going to be forgotten almost as soon as it’s read. If anyone gets that far…
With these 3 mistakes in mind, here are my biggest recommendations:
WHAT TO DO INSTEAD
✅ #1 – START WITH THE PROBLEM
We buy products and services for a reason.
If you start with the problem, then offer your solution, people will feel that you’re helping them. 👍
That’s where the buy-in comes from!
✅ #2 – KEEP IT SHORT & SWEET
Keep it short and sweet.
It doesn’t need to cover everything or answer every question in that first email! 😊
You just need to grab people’s attention and get them curious for more.
✅ #3 – INCLUDE A STORY
Help the reader/audience emotionally connect to what you’re selling, with a story.
Ideally a real one, from one of your customers. Even if it has to be de-identified.
One vendor delighted me by (in only a paragraph or two) sharing a client story which included an issue and that vendor solved it for them.
It captured attention, showed the value of the product and would absolutely entice the right customer to want to have a conversation to find out more.
So, it’s possible to do and should be easy if you have client success stories you could share!
You don’t want to get it wrong with a first email to potential clients. As it may be the only opportunity you get.
So, make sure to start with the problem, keep it short & sweet and include a story.
They’ll be more likely to read the whole thing and want to contact you to find out more.
P.S. If you’d like my eyes over one of your vendor email pitches, let me know. I’m happy to help!
Emily Edgeley is a Public Speaking Coach for the Technology industry. Since 2017 she’s run over 280 group coaching sessions, coached more than 250 people privately, and formally supported first time and experienced speakers at 10 Conferences, covering 1000+ people across the globe.
She’s on a mission to help anyone in the Tech arena learn how to speak with clarity, impact, and confidence, whether that’s at work or at a Conference. So they can share their ideas, build their brand and start to enjoy ‘public speaking’!